Looking Forward to 2019

This year I need some goals.  I need to progress.  I need to accomplish something.  :)

I realize that anything I accomplish will be tied to my desires, so I've spent some time thinking about what I really want and need in my life (What seek ye? - see John 1:38 and Ether 12:41) and hope to connect my goals to these things, so that I'm able to accomplish the most meaningful good and improvement.

Desires:
* To know and love the Savior, Jesus Christ and our Heavenly Father better, and have the constant guidance of the Holy Spirit.
* To learn and do His will, to build the kingdom of God, to help gather Israel, to fulfill my mission, to keep my covenants, to be ready, worthy, waiting, watching for the Savior’s return, the celestial kingdom, and eternal life, I want to be there--don't want to miss it!  This probably involves having a broken heart, a contrite spirit, and being humble enough every day to follow Him!
* To find an eternal companion, and build a happy marriage and family; find companionship, real friends, and build meaningful relationships; while always working to strengthen family relationships!
* To find truth, understanding, wisdom, peace, contentment, simplicity, clarity, direction, order, focus, purpose, meaning, happiness, joy.
* To find opportunities to learn, grow, progress, develop skills and talents, serve, help others, be useful and fruitful!
* To improve, repent, get ride of pride, be more selfless, more faithful, more thoughtful, more generous

Goals:
* Consistent faith-filled prayer.  Being more grateful, humble, full of love, and concern for others.
* Consistent meaningful study.  There is much I want to know and understand.  I want to work on gathering together in one the truth I learn.  I hope to find a consistent way to record what I learn, including a revelation/prayer journal, helping me to act on the things I learn and recognize progress in living the gospel better.  I'd like to continue my study of the standard works and the names, words, mission, and characteristics of Christ (including a focus on the Topical Guide and "The Living Christ").  I look forward to studying the New Testament and all of the Come, Follow Me resources for Sunday School this year.  I also plan to read the Book of Mormon at least twice focusing on a specific topic each time.  I'd like to read and study some selected BYU devotionals and continue to add to my favorite talks list, as I have time and hear good ones.  I also hope to find ways to have meaningful gospel discussions with family, friends, and others.

* Consistent meaningful service.  This year I want to find somewhere I can spend regular time helping others, besides the other things I hope to help my friends and family with, as needs arise.
* Consistent temple worship.  I feel like this hardly needs to be a goal--I love the temple and it's a great blessing to be there each week.  I hope to continue this habit and include more of my own family history work in the process.

* Learn, grow.  I hope to learn more this year, by reading and experiencing the world.  I plan to simplify my book reports a bit, but continue to read as much and to write.  I also plan to travel some and learn more about the world around me.  I had a pretty loose goal last year to work on improving my piano skills.  I'd like to be more focused on that and/or possibly Spanish this year.  There may be other gifts, talents, skills I can cultivate and I really want this to be a focus this year of using my time to learn and grow in the best ways and hopefully find joy in the process.  (I was inspired by President Eyring's art exhibit at the Church History Museum the last few months and how he used his "extra" to learn, create beauty, and find joy... I can limit social media and other distractions and do that too, in my own artist ways.)  I also plan to be a diligent journal keeper this year.  It's been a long time since I've been diligent in that regard and want to change.  And in all of these things that I learn, I hope to involve other people. ;)  Learning and growing in relationships is a key.  ;)

* Healthy lifestyle.  I hope, plan, intend to be more healthy this year--eating better, exercising more consistently, etc.  I may sign up for one race this year, I will definitely do a lot of hiking, but mostly I just want to work on being healthy--more water, less sugar and hopefully less weight.  ;)

* Side projects.  I don't know if saying these things out loud/writing them down officially will help them happen (making me more accountable) or jinx me, but I'd like to maybe create a blog or instagram page that's focused on sharing a reason for my hope (about the Savior and his gospel) each day (or so).  I'd also like to gather enough of my studying thoughts into one about some gospel principle that could become a poem and/or hymn.  And several have mentioned they'd like to see some of my instagram photos turned into a book.  Maybe I'll try to get serious about that in someway.  We'll see. ;)

Things I'm Looking Forward To:

I realize that in the past some of my "goals" were really just "things I'm looking forward to."  They're important and make life fun and you do have to plan to make them happen, so here's that list:
* Australia / New Zealand in February
* California in March
* Washington in April and September
* North Dakota + a few other highlights along the way in May/June
* St. George a few times
* Lots of hiking, to include a special all-day favorite in Idaho or Washington ("over the hill party")
* More temples
* Maybe someplace exciting for Christmas?

2018 Goals

In reflecting back on 2017 and thinking about some goals I've been trying to work on for a while, this year I want to simplify and focus on relationships!  Jesus taught that the most important commandment is to "love the Lord...with all [our] heart,... soul, and... mind" and then to "love [our] neighbour."  I know this and say it a lot, but this year I want to live it and prioritize it better.

I've been thinking about this the last few days and then when I heard of President Monson's passing early this morning, one of the first quotes I saw someone remember him by was from a 2008 talk where he said, "Never let a problem to be solved become more important than a person to be loved."  He talked so much about love and lifting others, "Every day of our lives we are given opportunities to show love and kindness to those around us.... Love is expressed in many recognizable ways: a smile, a wave, a kind comment, a compliment. Other expressions may be more subtle, such as showing interest in another’s activities, teaching a principle with kindness and patience, visiting one who is ill or homebound. These words and actions and many others can communicate love. May we begin now, this very day, to express love to all of God’s children, whether they be our family members, our friends, mere acquaintances, or total strangers. As we arise each morning, let us determine to respond with love and kindness to whatever might come our way."  And even more than he talked about it, President Monson lived it, and blessed so many individually and all of us by his example.

I want this to be my focus this year - people, relationships, love, kindness, and the Spirit that will help to direct and lead to the best ways to serve and the people that need to be noticed.  It's easy to get caught up in schedules, do-to lists, goals, checklists (even if they have some good things on them), but I think for me some of these have become a distraction from what's most important.

When I say I want to focus on relationships, here are a few specific ways:

• Heavenly Father - Most importantly, I want to strengthen my relationship with my Heavenly Father.  I'm a pretty consistent pray-er in my heart.  I feel like many and most of my thoughts are drawn out to and directed towards Him - expressing gratitude here and there, asking for help and guidance, thinking about His tender mercies - but I know that I need to be more focused in more formal and faith-filled prayers and will make this my highest priority this year.

• Jesus Christ - Knowing the Savior better is related and important.  He is my Advocate with the Father and the perfect example for what I need to become to make it home to Heavenly Father.  I loved and learned a lot last year studying the Book of Mormon specifically looking for the Savior - his words, his names, his mission, and his character.  I hope to continue this study in the Old Testament and other scriptures this year. 

• Holy Ghost - We learn truth and are guided and comforted by the Holy Ghost.  I would like more of that in my life and hope to be more attuned to His direction and ready to act.

• Me - One part of my focus on relationships this year is about me, I hope not selfishly, but I'd like to better know and love myself, be true to myself, worry less about others' expectations, and give myself permission to be me. :)  I want to learn and work on cultivating some talents - music, photography, writing, reading, language, hiking, running, cooking - and of course include some travel time (maybe Australia/New Zealand, Washington, Idaho, Montana, North Dakota, Minnesota, Florida?). 

• Family - I want to be more thoughtful about meaningful time with my family members this year - grandmothers, parents, siblings (and their spouses), niece/nephews, and extended family.

• Friends - Friends add much to the joy of life and I'd like to deepen relationships this year.

• Strangers - I hope to always be aware of those around me and find ways to lift and help.  I hope to find ways to consistently serve.

I realize, even in thinking about and articulating these goals, that relationships are work.  It takes being proactive and selfless, vulnerable and open, thinking more about someone else, listening, giving, being thoughtful, but I know relationships are rewarding and the reason we're here - there are people to love!  I want to do better.  <3

Happy New Year!

Korea - An Important Part of Who I Am

It was 16 years ago this week that I began one of the greatest adventures of my life - serving as a full-time missionary of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in Busan, Korean.  This experience has continued to bless my life, as it did this week very directly when we got together for a very special mission reunion.  Every missionary that ever served in any mission in Korea....for the past 60 years was invited and it was WONDERFUL!  I enjoyed seeing old friends and companions, but was particularly grateful for the chance to be reminded of who I was 14-16 years ago.

I was reminded of the courage and quiet confidence I had as a missionary.  I was full of purpose and meaning and confidence....in the Lord and His plan....and great love for a particular group of people.  Being around those people and the language and the memories helped me to remember who I truly am.  I had a strong testimony before I left on mission and I really wanted to share it, but having the chance to share it in Korea helped me to keep it simple and focused on the most important things and words that I knew.  ;)  There was no fear....just faith and love!

There are many things I wish I knew before I went.  I was kind of immature, but I also had an almost childlike faith and confidence.  Being with missionaries and Koreans again helped me feel and remember those experiences and the person I was then.  I'm proud of that person and time in my life.  I feel like these people knew the real me, the person I want to be.  I have grown in many ways since then, but have maybe lost some of the faith and confidence in myself.  I was grateful for the reminder of who these people know me as.  I immediately felt the same special happiness and confidence when surrounded by those memories.  I remember the greatest compliment I ever received as a missionary was from an investigator who told me that I had a heart like a Korean.  ;)

Koreans aren't shy, bu they are humble and teachable, they love and give and care about each other, they're united as family.  Being together as missionaries from several generations with the shared love for this wonderful group of people was uplifting.  There is a unique sense of belonging and unity among Koreans and those who served there - pride, joy, unity, gratitude.  I remember Elder Eyring coming to speak to us at a mission conference in 2001.  He talked about Helaman chapter 3 (see Helaman 3:24-27) and how thousands of people would join the Church in Korea because of the continual faith and prayers of the returned missionaries who loved these people and continued to pray for them.  I thought of this promise and have increased my faith and prayers for these people that I love!  :)

Here is a video of the program from that night.  Obviously it doesn't include the one-on-one time visits which were the highlight, but it does capture some of the culture, and history, and miracles, and blessings of being a part of this group.  One particular blessing I found was at 1:07:20 in the video.  It's a picture of some servicemen in Korea - some of the first "missionaries" - and right near the top middle of the picture is my Grandpa Morgan who was there at that time.  That is something very special that we share - a love for Korea and the sweet people of that land.  I'm grateful to remember who I am....and who I can be because of the gospel of Jesus Christ.

Why am I here?

Even with all the joy and hope that I've found in the scriptures and life lately, there are still hard days and I wonder sometimes - Why am I here?  What am I doing?  Particularly lately I've felt like maybe I could and should be doing something more somewhere else?  This is mostly in regards to my ward and Church service, but a few others things might fall into the category.

That's why I was SOOOO grateful for a very sweet testimony today that helped me understand my place now a little bit better.  ;)  A guy in our ward talked about serving his mission in Tonga.  He served for a time on a very small island where he knew everyone's name and no one was interested in listening.  He loved being a missionary, but wondered if his time might not be better spent somewhere else.  Why had the Lord sent him there?  Surely there were other places he could be making more of a difference.  As he thought and prayed and worried about this he received an answer from the Lord who said, "I brought you to this island, without other distractions, so that I could spend time with you!"  :D  How sweet is that!?  ;)

I believe that wherever we are the Lord truly does want to spend time with us, but the bigger issue (and as this brother pointed out since returning from his mission) is us making time for Him!  I think this is always important, but there may be certain times in our life when we either need a little more time with the Lord or He is specifically inviting us to not worry about a lot of others things and just spend time with Him!  I feel like I've had a lot of time on my hands lately - some I've used well, some less well, but my great desire truly is to spend this time with Him (whether that be in the scriptures, in prayer, in the temple, in service, in His beautiful creations, with His other children...)!  I know this brings the greatest happiness and direction and purpose and I'm very grateful for the reminder....that that's why I'm here.  ;)

2015 in Review

Looking back on 2015 it's kind of remarkable all that has happened!  In no particular order here are some of my adventures, highlights, and take-aways:

• I worked as an ordinance worker at the Salt Lake Temple.  Highlight!  Although I do appreciate a Saturday morning sleep-in or run or free weekend all the more now.  ;)
• I attended two new temples - Payson and Seattle.  Wonderful!
• I sang in three different choirs - ward choir, the Witness Music presentation of Rob Gardner's Lamb of God during Easter (really neat!!), and I was a part of the Salt Lake Temple Workers' Choir for the yearly devotional (incredible experience!)
• I bought a house!  Kind of exciting, kind of terrifying, very educational.
• I ran a marathon (my version of the Ogden Marathon which was more accurately two half marathons with a little drive in between) and two official half marathons (Big Cottonwood and Snow Canyon).
• I read a lot of books!  Some of my favorites:  Press On by Joseph B. Wirthlin; Return unto Me by Kerry Muhlestein; The Conservative Heart by Arthur Brooks; Essentialism by Greg McKeown; Gifts from the Sea by Anne Lindbergh; Truths Most Worth Knowing by Boyd K. Packer; Wonder by R. J. Palacio; Ezra Taft Benson: A Biography by Sheri Dew; The Wright Brothers by David McCullough; Power to Become by David A. Bednar; Teaching Your Children Joy by Linda and Richard Eyre; Belonging to Heaven by Gale Sears
• I spent time with family!  Always a highlight!!!  We enjoyed a wonderful week together in Las Vegas at the pool and remembering to 'stay by the tree.'  I spent several Sunday evenings and Thanksgiving with extended family.  I visited St. George a few times and spent lots of quality time with my parents - they're pretty great!  I got to be hostess for a few family gatherings (thanks for coming, Josh and Kirsten!) and visited my sister's house more (she and her family really know how to be host(esse)s).  I loved being in Seattle for an extended Christmas weekend - highlight!  Washington is beautiful and meeting a new nephew is the sweetest and getting on an airplane at least once a year is a must!  Thanks, Matt and Megan!  :)
• I deepened relationships.  I learned a lot about who I am, what I'm looking for, having confidence, and getting to know and be inspired by good people in large and small ways.  Relatedly, I learned again the importance of being happy, being grateful, being open, being vulnerable.  I'm grateful for friends, friendships, relationships, and opportunities to give and grow.  Much more to learn!  ;)  
• I enjoyed opportunities to share and teach the gospel.  I watched three new members join the Church and saw part of their conversion as I had the chance to teach Gospel Principles for much of the year.  HIGHLIGHT!!  I love the simple gospel truths, the plan of salvation, and the chance to testify of Jesus Christ!  What it's all about!!!
• I enjoyed lots of BEAUTIFUL wildflowers, fall leaves, and sunsets while consistently hiking and enjoying being outside and appreciating our Heavenly Father's creations!  One of the ways I see and feel God's love!
• I have a renewed testimony of the importance of and gratitude for prayer, scripture study, studying the gospel of Jesus Christ, learning the words of the Prophet and Apostles and following in faith.
• I have a greater appreciation for the Atonement of Jesus Christ and the hope and peace and joy and change it can bring!

It's that time of year....

Every Christmastime it seems there is a song that keeps finding me and I love this year's song:

Christmas Waltz
Frosted window panes

Candles gleaming inside
Painted candy canes on the tree
Santa's on his way
He's filled his sleigh with things
Things for you and for me

It's that time of year
When the world falls in love
Every song you hear seems to say
Merry Christmas
May your New Year dreams come true
And this song of mine
In three-quarter time
Wishes you and yours
The same thing too

Santa's on his way
He's filled his sleigh with things
Things for you and for me

It's that time of year
When the world falls in love
Every song you hear seems to say
Merry Christmas
May your New Year dreams come true
And this song of mine
In three-quarter time
Wishes you and yours
Everyone
Merry Christmas
Merry Christmas
May your New Year dreams come true (Merry Christmas)